Swami's Guidelines for Enlightenment
extracted from "Insight" magazine June '99 issue, page 15
Be a Fundamentalist - make sure the Fun always comes before the mental. Realise that life is a situation comedy that will never be cancelled. A laugh track has been provided and the reason why we are put in the material world is to get more material.
1. Have a good laughsitive twice a day and that will ensure regularhilarity.
2. Remember that each of us has been given a special gift just for entering - so you are already a winner.
3. The most powerful toll on the planet today is Tell-A-Vision. That is where I tell a vision to you and you tell a vision to me. That way, if we don't like the programming we're getting, we can simply change the channel.
4. Life is like photography. You use the negative to develop. No matter what adversity you face, be assured: Of course God love you - He's just not ready to make a committment.
5. It is true! As we go through life thinking heavy thoughts, thought particles tend to get caught between the ears, causing a condition called truth decay. So be sure to use mental floss twice a day. When you're tempted to practice tantrum yoga, remember what we teach in Swami's Adsurdiveness Training class: "Don't get even, get odd."
6. If we want world peace, we must let go of our attachments and truly live like nomads. That's where I no mad at you, you no mad at me. That way, there'll surely be nomadness on the planet. Peace begins with each of us. A little peace here, a little peace there, pretty soon all the peaces will fit together to make one big peace everywhere.
7. I know great earth changes have been predicted for the future, so if you're looking to avoid earthquakes, my advice is simple. When you find a fault, don't dwell on it.
8. There's no need to change the world. All we have to do is toilet train the world and we'll never have to change it again.
9. If you're looking to find the key to the Universe, I have some bad news and some good news. The bad news is - there is no key to the Universe. The good news is - it has been left unlocked.
10. Finally, everything I have told you is channeled. That way, if you don't like it, it's not my fault. Remember, enlightenment is not a bureaucracy. So, we don't have to go through channels.
Some good ideas here, don't you agree..? I
personally like 2, 3, 6 and 7 - which are you favourites.?